MH2 Drinking Game

How to get good and drunk while watching MH2. You know how these games work: drink the specified number of shots whenever stuff in the list happens. Don't worry if you haven't watched the whole series-- you won't get all the references, but I promise there are no plot spoilers! NOTE: This is decidedly a work in progress. Please suggest additions in the comments! The ones marked with a (*) were suggested by SkipEastport. The ones marked with a (**) were suggested by TG674. Thank you both! Take a single shot of the hard stuff whenever:

• Mary offers someone coffee. Extra shot if the offer comes at an inappropriate moment.

• Loretta gets a sudden inspiration for a new song. Extra shot if it's in poor taste.

• Mary keeps saying "Heather!" repeatedly, in response to Heather making her uncomfortable (Note: that's one shot per "Heather!")

• Mary rubs her front teeth.

• Vern calls Tex "You idiot!"

• Cathy announces she's broken up with her current boyfriend.

• Cathy announces she's got a new boyfriend (note that these last two will usually happen in the same scene).

Take two shots of the hard stuff whenever:

• Cathy announces she's engaged.

• Charlie shows off his back hair.(*)

• Cathy drinks a Crush.(*)

• Tom has a Schlitz.(*)

• Grampa Larkin mentions peanut butter.

• Martha cries.

• Martha breaks into song (happens about as often as the crying).

• Mary tries to gently break some bad news to someone.

• George's hair gets messed up (extra shot if he does it to himself on purpose).

• George sits on his special hemorrhoid pillow.(*)

• Tom says, "Cut it out!" (*)

• Tom screams, "I don't wanna talk about it, Mary!"

• Tom hollers, "What the Hell is wrong with you, Mary?"

• Mary tells someone that her gift is she can communicate.

• Loretta mispronounces "temporary" as "tempalary" ("temporarily"/"tempalarily" counts too).

These are really rare, so go ahead and chug a bottle of grain alcohol whenever:

• Charlie and Loretta have a fight.

• Tom and Mary have actual sex (with each other).

• George says anything nice to Martha.

• Someone dies in a bizarre way.

These, on the other hand, are so common that you should take just a sip of beer or wine (no hard stuff, unless you want to give yourself alcohol poisoning), whenever:

• Loretta thanks God for something.

• Loretta refers to herself as a future superstar (full shot if she refers to herself as already a superstar).

• Loretta and Charlie kiss.

• Tom repeats himself (basically every line by Greg Mullavey).

• Anyone says, "I don't know what you're talking about." (Note: whichever character says this always knows what the other person is talking about.) (**)

• Anyone says, "Everything's gonna be all right," "Calm down," or "Don't worry about it!" in response to another character being legitimately upset